Your kid helped clean up their toys today? Oh how sweet, mine can do flip-frackin MAGIC! BOOM!
You know, I feel a little bad that I've been on a bit of a "Stories from William" kick. Carter's just so damn young and mostly there's nothing new going on with him from day to day. If you ever want to know how Carter's doing, just say, "He's so adorable" to yourself. That's the day to day goings on of Carter. Oh! Furthermore Carter almost never kicks me in the crotch packet, what a nice boy. I'd love to write more stories about him. He just needs to give me a little more subject matter. I'll talk to him about that.
Ah, William. I've been reaching my limit with him as of late. One of these days, Melissa is going to come home to see me screaming into the recycle bin. I'm very eco-friendly. However, I stand by the fact that one of the greatest things ever about children is their ability to catch you off guard with something cute, funny, or just gross. I file this particular story under the funny category.
When I was in Elementary school, David Copperfield came to town. I went for my birthday. I think all kids are fans of magic because when you're a kid, it's pretty easy to get swept up in the idea that it's all real. Now many years, and lots of episodes of "Breaking the Magician's Code: Magic's Biggest Secrets Revealed" later, I understand that it's all trickery, though I still enjoy a good magic show. Not like David Blaine standing on a pole type of magic, but you understand what I mean. I like magic, not standing.
Fast forward to high school. A friend of mine knew a bunch of magic tricks and so I started learning a few from him. Looking back, I have no aptitude for this type of performing, but on occasion I would do different tricks around school. Oh how the ladies flocked to me. People say that knowing the secret of how it's done, ruins the enjoyment. I tend to disagree, which brings me back to William.
We took a trip down to Florida in February. William being right on the edge of turning 3 and being so in love in Mickey Mouse, I thought he would flip-out to go to Disney. That really didn't happen. Even a little. On the other hand, he did get a little bonding time with our friend's little boy, but mostly in the toy department. I found it pretty amusing honestly, here was William decked out in Handy Manny clothes with Handy Manny toys, and their little boy in his Cars clothing and Cars toys. They had to switch toys right away, and it was a pretty big deal to get them to switch back. Of course this means we had to buy William a set of the Cars toys...well done Disney.
Ever since that trip, the matchbox Lightening McQueen has been extremely important to William. He's also 3 years old which means his toys end up in all manner of places. Including places unknown to us. That's why we now own a total of 3 of the Lightening McQueen matchbox cars....well done Disney. On average I see one of the three every day, and who knows where they are otherwise. Sometimes though, William has two out at once, which he thinks is just super cool.
So several days ago I was sitting on the couch with Carter watching cartoons while William was at the end of the couch crashing two of his Lightening McQueen cars together. Normal day. Out of nowhere he waltzes over with one hand behind his back, and shows me one of the McQueen cars. Then! He put that hand behind his back and showed me the other McQueen car, in his other hand, with an enormous smile on his face. It was like he really wanted to amaze me with his new ability to somehow make a car disappear from one hand and reappear in the other. He knew exactly what he was doing, and did the trick a few more times. I kept waiting for him to say, "Ta-da!" but he just sat there smiling at me.
What age does he need to be before I buy him the Aztec Tomb and play "The Final Countdown" while he does illusions for dozen of people?
Also, do I buy him the sequin shirt that opens down to mid-chest now, or does that get issued when he's actually in Vegas?