Thursday, May 31, 2012

Thoughts from the Walks

I pass by a little shopping area that has a Little Caesar's Pizza on my walks with the boys, and I just have to say, I do not understand this marketing idea with the young kids who dance outside holding the sign that lets you know, "Hey! If you'd only turn your head slightly more to the right you'd see the actual business, there it is! YAY!" I wish I cared enough to find out if that has really done anything to boost sales. Seriously, I just can't imagine the set up where you see the dancing kid and realize that you must have pizza right away! As you swerve into the parking lot, endangering the lives of everyone around you, dancing sign boy...dances on.

I know the exact location where I first saw this type of advertising. It was back in Florida, outside the Outback that I had been working at, and there was a guy holding a sign for a smoothie place who was dressed as a banana. Now, he had a personal CD player with headphones and was rocking out hardcore to the music, but with the banana costume all you could see was strange dancing banana guy with the smoothie place sign. I thought he was hilarious to watch, but Melissa and I never went to the smoothie place. Not even once. As amusing as I found him, he didn't ever make me want a smoothie.

It dawns on me that outside of pizza places, and the occasional smoothie place, the only other business who seems to be using this method of advertising around here is the cash for gold places. The one I like best here is Cash 4 Gold, while I have never used any of these businesses as I lack both gold and cash, I'm basing my opinion on the one I pass by the most. That's why it wins out over Cash for Gold or $ for Gold or even $$$4GOLD. Which brings me to my favorite ever sign holder, and I think it will help if you listen to the South Park, Cash for Gold song while you read the rest of this:

One of my biggest issues regarding these masters of sign stabilization is the overall pointlessness to their job. I would never openly promote taking jobs away from the hard working, skinny jean wearing youth of America, but it seems to me that if your job could be done by the ground, you are not really needed. To take this concept to the next level, a grown woman...someone who filled out her own tax form which later read: occupation - outdoor advertising specialist....brought a little bit of genius to work with her one day. As I drove by Cash 4 Gold, there she was, sitting on a lawn chair and using a umbrella base from an outdoor patio set as a hands free device for the sign. Amazing. Two very interesting things happened after that. First, the lady was fired (I think so anyway. I have not seen her since). Which is crap, because you really shouldn't get pissed at someone for outsmarting a broken job idea. Everyone says to work smarter, not harder...seems like she hit the brain jackpot on that one. Second, THEY HIRED SOMEONE ELSE!!!! <---!!! Am I wrong to think that you have to be a special kind of idiot to have an employee give you a live demonstration of why a job is pointless, and then hire another person to do it?

So, seeing the Little Caesar's dancing kid got me thinking. So many places are not taking advantage of this type of advertising. It might be because they think it's stupid and pointless, but maybe it's because they don't think there would be someone willing to perform that type of job for their type of business. Which is why, when the boys are both in school, I'd like to offer my services to local day care places. My personal idea would be to dress up as a giant container of baby wipes, and I don't want to get too far ahead of myself as this would be years away, but I've got a hip hop song idea called "Do the Wipe" and a dance move called "The Wipe." I'm pretty sure people driving by a day care that had a dancing container of wipes, would want to send their children there. Thoughts?


  1. The tax service companies have done that for years in Dallas...they all dress up as the Statue of Liberty! I see it commonly also for furniture or rug stores that are closing.

    Baby wipes would be interesting.....and I would probably pay to see you dressed as a container of them!

    1. That's actually a good point Michelle. We had a rug store that had someone on the corner for a while. Eventually they just went the "stick it in the ground" route. They were closing for like...3 years. I'll be sure to get pictures up if said costume is ever made. Glad you stopped by for a read!